LIES AND HOW TO DEAL WITH THEM
Today, I’m touching on a sensitive subject that concerns everyone: lies—deliberate lies, white lies, unconscious lies. It’s a heavy topic, I know, but what else should we call it when someone tells themselves or others something that isn’t true?
The consequences range from mildly irritating to downright horrific. In politics, we’ve coined new terms like “fake news” and “alternative facts.” Digital tools make it easy to fabricate identities, forge all kinds of documents—even manipulate bank accounts. Nothing seems to be 100% verifiable anymore. That’s the world we live in today.
Just because someone speaks with great conviction, has persuasive presentation skills, or holds an impressive reputation doesn’t make a lie the truth.
THE LIES WE TELL OURSELVES
Let’s start with the lies we tell ourselves. Our ego—the part of our mind that clings to a collection of memories and forms our sense of “I am”—is a master of disguise. It skilfully alters the narratives we tell ourselves, shaping them to its own advantage. Most of us wholeheartedly believe these self-created stories, the voice in our heads repeating them over and over. Worse still, we call our attachment to these beliefs “authenticity.” We even go to great lengths to convince others that what we believe—and who we think we are—is true, assuming that external validation confirms our version of reality.
This self-deception would go entirely unnoticed if not for something deep within us that remains unconvinced—no matter how skilfully we deceive ourselves. Some call it conscience, others the voice of the heart.
The longer we live in contradiction—between what is genuinely true and what we’ve made to appear true—the higher the price we pay: loss of confidence, loss of self-esteem, and ultimately, loss of happiness.
Truth always prevails. One of life’s fundamental laws is:
What is true expands, and what is untrue fades away.
Postponing the inevitable stems from fear—fear of facing the truth. The ego resists acknowledging the truth about itself with all its might. This resistance becomes especially tricky when the ego is educated in spiritual principles. In such cases, it manipulates this knowledge to create the most subtle spiritual lies, all to maintain its old patterns.
THE LIES WE TELL OTHERS
People also lie to others—in their résumés, their behaviour, their words. They lie to loved ones, business partners, authorities—anyone they feel it’s necessary to deceive.
Why do people lie? Fear. It’s always fear.
Those whose egos feel inferior portray themselves as great. Those whose egos are cunning pretend to be honest. Those whose egos harbour resentment feign kindness. And so it goes.
In this world of deception, the only solid ground we can find is in facing our own lies.
THE COURAGE TO FACE THE TRUTH
This requires enormous courage—existential courage—because confronting our own lies feels, to the ego, like dying, like annihilation. Most people would rather keep living their lies and pay the price.
In my work with people, I see the consequences of this every day—in their lightless eyes, their defensive postures, their silent cries for help. Shame, guilt, and fear serve as the ego’s mighty guards, protecting its untruths. It’s a lonely place to live.
I am certain that without the heroic commitment to dissolving the lies in our lives, fulfilment, blessings, and true happiness will remain out of reach. This is especially true for those on a path of self-realization—whether spiritual, religious, or personal-growth-oriented.
For those brave souls who recognize the inevitability of this challenge, freedom isn’t far off. With every act of truthfulness, others are encouraged to do the same. And when there are no more lies, there’s no more fear.
And that, to me, is paradise
With love, ❤ Marc